What is a funny classroom incident?

I was working a two day assignment in a local high school. The teacher hired at the beginning of the year had quit two weeks ago and the students had been living with a series of subs since then. Plus, it was Spirit Day--periods were half length with the promise of an afternoon of shouting and face painting to follow. It was like the wild west in there and the lesson plans ran out the day before I showed up. The Cabell County Schools Smart Find Express Substitute Management System failed to mention these things when it called me the night before.

I cobbled together a brief lesson on literary terms based on the last legible assignment I could find in the vacated teachers book and things were going reasonably well until fourth period. Because of lunch, this was the only period that was standard length and this was the largest class of the day. The students had that wild look about them that is only present in 10th graders who have spent the day eating candy and watching movies.

About thirty minutes in, everyone was shouting and my job went from defining "flat character" to keeping anyone from getting stabbed.

There was one student who was mildly autistic. When chaos erupted, it was obvious he couldn't deal with it. He smooshed down in his chair and tried to focus on his assignment. You could see him getting more and more tense as the volume in the room steadily increased. Frustrated with my meek and ineffectual attempts to quiet the room, finally he could take it no longer. He was larger than me with a deep, booming voice that echoed off the walls when he shouted "Quiet, you ignorant fools!" Unfortunately this had the opposite of the intended effect.

In retaliaiton for his outburst, a nearby student replied "You're just jealous of my tattoos," and rolled up his sleeves to show him said decorations. This was delivered with the casual and practiced nature that only comes from a hurtful and long running teasing. The kind of teasing that is inpenetrable to the observer but for some reason maddening to the recipient.

I didn't think it was fair for this student to suffer at the hands of his tattooed peers because of my poor classroom management skills. I asked him quietly if he'd like to finish his assignment in the hallway. He thought that sounded like a swell idea and rose to follow me out of the room.

When we reached the door, he said to me (very politely) "Excuse me sir..." and turned to face the class with a look of sheer conviction written across his face. Quaking with emotion he intoned, "I just want to say that I don't give a damn about your tattoos!"

I suppose I should have been mad because this did nothing but serve to stir things up further, but I was proud of him. He took his stand and made his exit.

But even more than that, never before has someone so perfectly captured how I was feeling. But I had to equivocate.

"Roll down your sleeves and get back to work."

FEEDBACK

GREAT!!!

Excellent and very well said. k.s.